Turkey Day

That's about all I've got time to write....busy with the bird and making pie!

Leave Santa Alone!

Yahoo.com is my home page. When I opened my browser this morning, I saw this article about Santa.....and I thought, "What the #%$&@&$^@?!?!?!??!?!????" Are you kidding me.....??? Santa can't say, "ho, ho, ho", because it might offend WOMEN....? What women? The HOs??? Too bad! Or a bunch of uptight, overly politically correct morons with broomsticks jammed up their bums??? Get over it!

And do the children think of prostitutes when Santa says that....?

Santa: Ho, ho, ho, Bobby!!
Bobby: Wow, Santa, I get THREE prostitues this Christmas????!

I am really sick and tired of all this "politically correct" crap and fear of offending someone.....and that is coming from a person who is rather PC and tries to consider feelings and not offend and blah, blah, blah.

But enough is ENOUGH.....this is going too far.....and really, don't we have bigger fish to fry in the world? I say.....

LEAVE SANTA ALONE!


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Article: http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20071115/wl_asia_afp/lifestyleaustraliachristmasoffbeat

SYDNEY (AFP) - Santas in Australia's largest city have been told not to use Father Christmas's traditional "ho ho ho" greeting because it may be offensive to women, it was reported Thursday.
Sydney's Santa Clauses have instead been instructed to say "ha ha ha" instead, the Daily Telegraph reported.

One disgruntled Santa told the newspaper a recruitment firm warned him not to use "ho ho ho" because it could frighten children and was too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute.

"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs the campaign against sexualising children called Kids Free 2B Kids.

"We are talking about little kids who do not understand that "ho, ho, ho" has any other connotation and nor should they," she told the Telegraph.

"Leave Santa alone." [I agree!!!]

A local spokesman for the US-based Westaff recruitment firm said it was "misleading" to say the company had banned Santa's traditional greeting and it was being left up to the discretion of the individual Santa himself.

Where Have You Been All My Life?

I love photography. I'm not professional by any means, and maybe some people don't even think I'm very good at it! I don't care -- I love it regardless.

At one time, I had a pretty good film camera. It was an Olympus hybrid SLR. But I couldn't photograph as much as I would have liked, because film and developing costs were involved. With digital -- not an issue.

When our nice Nikon camera died, I rushed out and bought a cheapy point and shoot from Staples. Another Olympus. It's actually been a good camera for us, and my mom ended up getting the same model [FE-210]. For about $130, I got some really good photos.

But it was time for a REAL camera....

After hours and hours of research, I had narrowed my camera search to two models: the Nikon D80, and the Canon 30D. Both are stellar DSLRs, and I kept going back and forth between the two models. Everybody had a different opinion, and the Canon vs. Nikon battled raged on!

Finally, I went to Best Buy to see both of these beasts in person. There's really only so much you can tell from looking at photos online. I needed to hold these cameras and decide if one just felt "right" in my hands.....

I felt like Harry Potter looking for the right wand....when I found it, I'd know. This turned out to be true.

Prior to this shopping trip, I think I was leaning towards the D80, so I picked it up first. After a few minutes to looking it over and pretending to shoot, I put it down and was handed the 30D.

And that's all it took. This camera felt like a REAL camera. It was a little heavier than the D80 and what I was expecting, but that was okay. It felt like a real camera, and it felt good in my hands.

At that point, I think I knew -- I was going to buy the Canon. But I went home to do a little more research and opinion gathering, as that is my nature. Research it to DEATH, but I rarely have any buyer's remorse, so I guess that's the pay-off.

The next day, I returned to Best Buy. Ironically, I had received a 10% coupon in the mail. Big plus, since I had decided to get the 40D and not the 30D....and there's about a $300 price difference. All I read told me that the 40D had some necessary improvements over the 40D.

Since unpacking my new baby, I have been in HEAVEN. Even some quickie "tests" have turned out phenominal!! I almost cried the first night I downloaded the photos from the camera. I love this camera and couldn't be happier! The photos in this posting obviously came from my new love....

Happy Birthday, Taylor!

My New Baby

I've Had ENOUGH!

Nicholas celebrated his second Halloween yesterday. He was only two months old for his first one. We dressed him as a lobster and carried him around to our neighbors last year. Andy stayed at the house, and the girls, Nicholas and I went trick-or-treating.

This year, it was just Nicholas and me. The girls were with their mom, and Andy was on an airplane somewhere, trying to get home to us.

Nick was a lion this year and a darn cute one at that! He helped me pass out candy, and once again, we visited our neighbors. They kept offering candy, but Nick has yet to enjoy the bliss that chocolate can bring! Well, for some.....chocolate doesn't do anything for me. So, we passed....

Went all out with the decorations this year. We had webbing, multiple carved pumpkins, fake spiders, howling things in the trees....it was too fun! Only scared one kid, but my brave boy wasn't afraid! He liked to set off the chattering heads and stick his finger in their plastic mouths.

But, by 7:00 p.m., he had ENOUGH of the whole Halloween gig. So, I changed him into his soft, warm jammies and got his bedtime bottle ready. One more pair of boys rang the bell, and with that, Trick-or-Treating 2007 was over.

Nicholas and I snuggled on the couch while he drank his bottle and immediately passed out. My little lion was obviously quite tired....which was GOOD, because Mommy forgot to turn off the howling things in the trees.....they went off all night, and they were right below Nicholas's bedroom window! I didn't discover my boo-boo until I heard them going off in the background of his baby monitor....whoops! Let's hope my neighbors still speak to me.....

I hope everyone had a Happy and SAFE Halloween!

Happy Halloween!

Silly, FUNNY Halloween Card

Ultimate Toy Drive

Click Here for more information on helping.

Glitter Graphics

More fun with whacky text....this time, it's from glitter-graphics.com. These sites are great for generating silly, animated text that can be used on Myspace, bulletin boards, social networking sites, your own site, etc. They are also easy to do, so the kids can have fun with them!



I'll have to make sure I show the girls their names. Both girls like hearts, so these are both good ones for them. But they may like one of the other ones better. Maybe Taylor can add to her E-mails to friends....

This Doesn't Make You Cheap....

Need a nice dinner out? [I do, I do!!] Want to save some money, too? [Yes, ma'am!] Then check out restaurant.com. I use this site all the time -- even when I travel for work! I've gotten some great deals at really nice restaurants all over the country and saved some big $$$, too.

Right now, Restaurant.com is offering 70% off! This means their $25 restaurant gift certificates that normally sell for $10 have been reduced to just $3!! So, for $3, you get a gift certificate worth $25. Make sense? This is why I sometimes use these when I travel -- I get a nicer dinner, and keep my expenses low, so my manager doesn't get upset!

This offer is valid from October 24th to the 31st, so get yours today and plan a special night out with or withOUT the kids....CLICK HERE to get yours. And use the code TREATS. Otherwise, you won't get the 70% off.



About Restaurant.com:
Restaurant.com serves as the community matchmaker, introducing great restaurants to great people. From appetizers to dessert, from wine to dinner, Restaurant.com helps restaurant owners promote the new and unique aspects of their restaurants while providing diners with great value in a fun, new and cost effective way. Your favorite restaurant is in your neighborhood – maybe you just don't know it yet. Restaurant.com is here to help.

The Bug War

I've lived with my older brother, Scott, twice. The first time didn't end on the best terms [he's 13 years older and a "he"....and we're a lot alike]. But we gave it another try. I even helped him pack up his apartment to move into the house we would share.

Well, my brother is a pack rat, and he had tons of JUNK.....including some plastic cockroaches. While he wasn't around, I slipped them into my purse for later.

That started what has become known as "The Bug War" in our family. After we moved into the new house, I hid the cockroaches in various places -- under a phone receiver, on a kitchen shelf, etc. Once my brother started to find them, the game was on.

Next, he took a creepy spider decoration I had bought for Halloween and attached it to fishing line. This he attached to the toilet seat, so when I got up at 2:00 a.m. to use the bathroom.....yeah, I screamed when that big, black spider came flying out from behind the toilet!
This went back and forth, each trying to best the other with plastic snakes coming out of tub drains and spiders on fruit and creepy bugs under things. All fake and plastic, of course. It quietly ended, and I eventually moved out.

Years later, it was my brother's wedding. It wasn't until THEN that I learned that I had WON The Bug War hands-down....something my brother would never admit to, but I found out a funny story from his good friend, Dave. He noticed a plastic spider sitting on an apple in a bowl of fruit and asked why it was there. Mom explained about The Bug War, and Dave was laughing so hard, he was crying. He then told us the following story.....

One of the "bugs" I had hidden during the war was a plastic leach. I had placed this leach on the rim of the toilet bowl in my brother's bathroom. My brother wouldn't see it until he lifted the seat to you know......

I guess Dave was at the house when Scott discovered the leach. Dave said he was in the kitchen waiting for Scott, and heard Scott SCREAMING! [I hate that I missed this....] He ran upstairs, and Scott had somehow found a two by four [in the bathroom????] and was ready to beat the plastic leach senseless......

This story is quite legendary in our family.....how I won The Bug War with a plastic leach bought for .50.

Do I LOOK Like a Shoplifter....?

Sunday night, I was flying solo with Nicholas and decided we'd go do a little shopping. A new super Wal-Mart opened near us, and I figured we'd check it out. I don't typically shop at Wal-Mart. I'm more of a Target girl and spend scary amounts of money there, but the W-M is closer to the house, and I wanted to check out their Halloween decorations.

Mr. Nick and I had a good shopping experience. We found some light-up pumpkins and other fun holiday stuff. I let Nick pick out a stuffed animal. He had been SUCH a good boy on the ride home from Columbus and while I ran errands. He liked this little, soft dog that barked when you squeezed it, and it was only about $7.....so, I got it for him. Grabbed some dinner items and other "stuff" and checked out. Paid, loaded our bags and headed for the door.

So, they have these greeters, right? I just thought they were there to say, "hello, welcome to Wal-Mart" as you walked in. Well.....when did Wal-Mart become Costco and want to check your receipt before you could leave????

The greeter [who was this small, older man and never cracked a smile] stopped me and asked to see my receipt as I was walking by.

Uhhhhh.....what????

I gave him this odd look and pulled it out of a bag. He stood there looking over it, and I noticed one or two people pass by with their carts and bags. Why wasn't he stopping THEM? So, I ASKED.

"Sooo....do you stop everyone?"

"No." Pause. Then he mentioned something about an "item" being outside the bags, and THAT is why he stopped me.

Well, that item was the $7 stuffed dog. I had pulled it from the bag as we headed for the door and given it to Nick. And for THAT, I get stopped and treated like I'm shoplifting....?

Come on, Wal-Mart. First off, I haven't stolen anything from a store since I was about five....not that you can tell that from looking at me......BUT I am relatively clean cut, and I'm in my late 30s and a mother with a toddler. I don't look like I need to steal, because I can't afford to buy something, and I'm certainly not a teen looking for a rush or thrill. Plus, if I were going to steal something, then do you really think I would run the risk of legal action over a stupid $7 stuffed animal??? The light-up pumpkin cost more! Heck, the raw chicken I bought cost more!

On top of that, the "greeter" wasn't all that friendly or nice about stopping me, because he felt the need to confirm the purchase of that stupid stuffed dog. And he had to MARK my receipt with his little highlighter. Are you KIDDING me????

As we left the store, I said to Nicholas, "We won't be shopping THERE again, baby!" And we won't. I doubt anyone at Target would have stopped me.....

Homecoming

This past weekend was Ohio State homecoming. We made a quick trip up North to visit the 'rents, see some other relatives and watch the game. Fortunately, the Buckeyes beat Michigan State and remain number 1. Woo hoo! I'm hoping this winning streak continues....I remember many years of being disappointed in the team....those would be the Cooper years. I'm a much bigger fan of Tressel.

So, this morning, we all met for breakfast at Bob Evans [minus the hubby who was on a plane headed for California]. Nicholas got to meet his Great Great Aunt Dorothy. She was sisters with my grandmother, Effie. And Dot and Nick share a birthday.

Well, off to bed! My brain is blah, and I'll have a busy week flying solo with Mr. Nick.

Happy Happy...

Happy Birthday to me AND Happy Anniversary to us.....a doubly good day.

Her Eyes Just Sparkle!

Lately, I've fallen in love with Adobe Photoshop all over again. I've been using that program for about twenty years, but I am learning ALL sorts of new, cool, crazy and exciting things....and I'm having a blast!

This week, I've been going crazy with brushes. Last week, it was Styles, but this week it is definitely brushes. Who knew so many existed??? Who knew they came in so many funny, funky, cool and unusual shapes??? Well, now I know, that's for sure!

Over the weekend, I downloaded some brushes from deviantart.com. I kept hearing this site mentioned in some of my Photoshop groups, so I finally checked it out. What FUN I've been having with the brushes I found there!

Last night, I played around with an eyelash brush.....and sparkles. Look at the results! I know I went a little overboard, but it's hard to believe that the "After" was achieved in about five minutes. And with brushes....[okay, okay, and a little dodging, too].

Operation Buckeye, Part II

This weekend, I've been working on a new logo and Web site for Operation Buckeye for my dad....here's a sneak peek at the logo.

What's the Most Common Birthday?

I was curious about this answer myself, so I did some research. Lo and behold.....[drum roll, please].....it's TODAY.

From an article I found online:

We found several references to this question on the Web, all pointing to the same source: a survey of 12,576 Americans conducted by Anybirthday.com.

Answers like this one from the Fredericksburg Free Lance-Star cite the study's finding of October 5 as the date the most people (in the U.S., anyway) are born. The 2001 report claims approximately 968,000 living Americans entered the world on that date. (The original web page announcing these results is no longer online, but we oh-so-cleverly queried the Internet Archive Wayback Machine and found it.)

So why October 5? Just a random date? Perhaps, but Anybirthday has a theory: To be born on this date, a baby would most likely have been conceived on New Year's Eve.

The survey also found May 22 to be the least common birthday. As yet, no guesses as to what it is that happens in late August (nine months prior to that date) that routinely turns so many people off. Perhaps it's just too darn hot?

Tossing His Tacos

My poor baby is sick. I heard him fussing about on his monitor in the middle of the night, and I went upstairs to check on him. Ack! He'd thrown up all down the front of himself. Unfortunately, hubby was out of town, so I was flying solo with puke duty.

So, at about 1:00 a.m., I gave Nicholas a bath and changed him into new jammies. He fell back asleep on the floor of his room, so I was able to change his sheets and mattress pad and clean everything up. I carefully placed him back in his crib and headed back to bed.

Thankfully, I am a light sleeper. At about 3:00 a.m., I heard him fussing around again. He was making the telltale "I'm about to throw up" sound, so I ran upstairs and grabbed him out of his crib.....not fast enough, though! This time, some ended up on the wall behind the crib.

Once again, he had a bath and got new jammies. Instead of putting on new sheets on his crib mattress, I covered his mattress in huge beach towels -- about five of them! If he threw up, then it would make it easier to clean up. I could just remove that "layer" or towel and not have to completely redo it all.

That was it for the puke fest, however. The next day, I worked from home and kept Nicholas with me. He seemed pretty good, a little fussy. His appetite was decreased [to be expected!], but he kept it all down......

The Devil Wears Pampers

Personally, I think my son is a little angel....he is a VERY good baby [now toddler]. I really can't complain, because he is so sweet, loving and easy going. However, that doesn't mean he doesn't have a devilish side.....

Russian woman's 12th baby weighs in at 17.1 POUNDS?!?!??!?!?!!

My first [and only] biological child weighed a hefty 9 lbs. 6 oz. at birth. I did not have a C-Section, and I'm not sure if I should be proud or embarrassed that I pushed that huge, ole noggin of his out! But my child is a mere shrimpy compared to THIS one......

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BARNAUL, Russia (Reuters) - A Siberian woman who gave birth to her 12th child -- doing more than her fair share to stem Russia's population decline -- was stunned to find that little Nadia weighed in at a massive 7.75 kg (17.1 lb).

Nadia was delivered by caesarean section in the local maternity hospital in the Altai region on September 17, joining eight sisters and three brothers, a local reporter said.

"We were all simply in shock," said Nadia's mother, Tatyana Barabanova, 43. "What did the father say? He couldn't say a thing -- he just stood there blinking."

"I ate everything, we don't have the money for special foods so I just ate potatoes, noodles and tomatoes," she told the reporter, adding that all her previous babies had weighed more than 5 kg.

The Guinness World Records lists a 10.2 kg baby boy born in Italy in 1955, and a 10.8 kg baby boy who was born in the United States in 1879 but died 11 hours later.

The average weight for most healthy newborn babies is around 3.2 kg (7.06 lb), according to World Health Organisation figures.
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Did you also happen to notice it was her TWELFTH baby.....?

Thanks, Honey....

In a few weeks, we will have two special events to celebrate. Our wedding anniversary is the same day as my wife's birthday.

Let me say that again -- our wedding anniversary is the SAME DAY as my wife's birthday. In other words, as a guy, I only have ONE really important day to remember each year instead of two.

This is a GREAT thing, but it could also be a really bad thing....like, what if I forgot it? I don't think I ever would, but if I did....well, I would be forgetting TWO important things, so I'm guessing the wrath that would follow would be twice as bad.....

But since I never plan to forget this date, I'm back to this being a GREAT thing....and it isn't so bad for the wifey either. Frankly, she ends up getting a better gift, because she usually wants one big thing. We just lump the gift giving all together for her.

Last year, it was this fancy iJoy massage chair. This year....well, she'll just have to wait and find out!

Dad Labs, Inc.

Recently, I was contacted by the COO of Dad Labs, Inc., Brad Powell. He said, "Hey got baby!, come check us out!" So, we did....

About Dad Labs:

America has seen a fundamental societal shift in the role of men in parenting. While many in the media and academia have observed this trend, no brand or company has emerged to meet the needs of these "New" fathers. Enter Dad Labs, Inc., a start-up company dedicated to providing creative media content and information products to serve this new generation of "Super Dads."
Dad Labs will be the fatherhood brand.

Headquartered in Austin, Texas, Dad Labs is an information and entertainment company that fosters the father/child relationship through media, instructional and retail products. The mission of the company is to strengthen families and benefit children by empowering today's fathers. The company provides resources to expecting, new and veteran fathers that will launch them into a more active and creative role in the lives of their children. Dad Labs speaks to the corporate executive and the delivery driver with a voice that is authentic and genuinely male, with wisdom and self-depracating humor of experience. The products and services offered are honest, informative, sometimes off-color, but always dedicated to the spirit of fatherhood. Dad Labs speaks guy and presents information through guy-colored lenses.

Founded in 2004 by Troy Lanier, Clay Nichols and Brad Powell, Dad Labs aims to be the voice of the new fatherhood. The company was founded on the core value that parents must be the primary movers in the lives of their children and fathers must play a leading role in this journey. The team at Dad Labs is committed to assisting the busy father by providing him with accessible and digestible information and parenting ideas. Dad Labs will not only inform the father with its entertainment products, but will also foster creative father/child activities through retail products.

The trio bring more than 30 years of teaching and hands on fatherhood experience, as well as professional film making and writing experience. Troy Lanier and Clay Nichols are accomplished authors and were named to the Austin Chronicle Best of 2005 for their book "Filmmaking for Teens: Pulling off Your Shorts." The company's first DVD, DueDads: The Man's Survival Guide to Pregnancy scheduled for release in the summer of 2006 recently won a 27th annual Bronze Telly Award.

All three founders have been long time teachers at Austin's St. Stephen's School and combined have seven small children.

Some Dad Labs Links:

Dad Labs Blog
Creative Team

When do You Find the Time.....?

More than once, I've been asked, "When do you find the time to write in your blog?" Or create new designs? Or clean the house? Or do all that cool Photoshop stuff? Or get a hair cut or pedicure? Or....breath....???

There isn't an easy, simple answer, but I would have to say: prioritize and multi-task are a big part of it. Oh, and make lists! I'm a big list maker. It really motivates me to cross things off, so it's more likely to get done if it's on a list!

Here might be my list for today [in no particular order]:

1. Finish report to manager and E-mail
2. Write in blog, moderate any comments
3. Make breakfast [Sunday is our big breakfast day]
4. Clean up after breakfast
5. Check E-mail
6. If there's time, do some research on story behind "We Are Marshall" [which we watched last night]
7. Laundry -- clean new sheets we just bought, fold clothes
8. Create some new designs -- it's been awhile
9. Complete FSA paperwork for refund
10. Return items to Target and K-mart [this probably won't get done until this week]

I'm sure there's more, but that gives you an idea. Thus far, I've done 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 [other than the folding part]...and I'm working on 2 now. And I've done all this online stuff in the last hour, because my baby is snoozing away.....Zzzzzzzzzzzzz................because when he's awake, he is my focus. And when the girls are here, they are usually the focus. No matter what else might be a priority, the kids are THE priority.

And that's key for me -- get stuff done when Nick is napping! Or during my lunch break. Or after Nick goes to bed. Whenever I can find a free moment, I squeeze something in. And since I've prioritized my list, I always know what my top "must do" items are. I do those first and then work down to the medium priority and so on. And accept that some things might not get done as soon as I had hoped [if at all!].

Oh well, the kids are the priority, so other things can just wait....speaking of which, my baby is awake, so it's time to go!

Stop Hogging the Blog!

In the summary of this blog, you might have noticed this sentence: New mom, Designer and Research Freak and her husband share their adventures in parenthood! You see the "and her husband" part....? Well, that's me. I'm the husband. But the wife has been making most of the posts, so I told her it was my turn. After all, it's our blog.

So, summer is coming to an end [even though it doesn't feel like it today], and I was thinking back on all of the fun our family has had in the past few months.....trips to Cedar Point and Seattle, Nick's first birthday, hot days at the pool, weekends of sailing.....it's been a good summer.

This photo is from Cedar Point. My girls, Taylor and Sarah, are in front, and Nicholas and I are in back. My wife took the photo. Taylor was so excited to "drive" the old car!

In the photo above, the girls are having fun on Lake Sammamish. My best friend, Rodney, recently bought a boat. We took it out on a beautiful afternoon, and everyone had a great time playing out on the water. Sarah was too afraid to go on the tube alone, so her loving big sis went along for the ride.

We're looking forward to the good times we know will come with the holidays.....

The Exceedingly Complex Role of the Stepmom

The Exceedingly Complex Role of the Stepmom
by Teresa Paprock


"Do you, the bride, take this man, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health. . . and do you take his kids?"

You may never hear a minister utter these words at a wedding, but in theory, they're becoming more and more appropriate. The "blended family" - a term that is both celebrated and abhorred, depending on whom you ask, is becoming a fact of modern life.

Statistics show that while one out of every two marriages today will end in divorce, three-fourths of divorced people will eventually remarry (suggesting that the institution of marriage is alive and well, even if people sometimes pick the wrong partner). Unfortunately the rate of divorce for second marriages is even higher. And step relationships can be a huge factor.

Ask any family therapist, and they'll agree: the stepmother generally has the most challenging role in these new families. There are plenty of reasons for this, starting with history. One research group found some 900 stories referring to the concept of an "evil stepmother", the most well known of these "Snow White"? and "Cinderella"? Certainly there are stepmothers that do terrible things (as there are biological mothers that do). And the myth is becoming less acceptable as more and more women take on the stepmother role. But it's still true that stepmothers have an uphill battle on almost every front.

The role of a stepmother is exceedingly complex. A stepmom can get whiplash trying to negotiate her way around competing interests and attempting to find a path through veritable mazes of paradox. Stepmoms often have all of the responsibilities of parenting (think cooking, cleaning, laundry) but none of the legal rights. Stepmoms may constantly be trying to find the middle ground between being a child's pal and being a disciplinarian. Those who feel no love for their stepchildren are seen as cold; those who do can be accused of "trying to take the place of the biological mother". In short, being a stepmom means pleasing some of the people only some of the time.

A stepparent's role in a family is unique in that it is born of loss. A child has lost a natural parent due to death or divorce; the natural parent may be in the child's life all the time, or may be gone, but a child's dreams of having "the perfect family" have been shattered, and a stepmom is the living proof of that fact.

A stepmom's relationship with the biological mother can range from friendly to neutral to downright hostile.

"I consider myself very lucky," says Claire, whose household contains her two children and her husband's two children, all under the age of nine. "At first, my stepchildren's biological mother was really angry. But over time she realized that I take good care of the kids, and now we are best friends."

Not everyone is so fortunate.

"When I first got married I had this fantasy that the biological mother and I would be friends and would co-parent this child together," says Kyra. "Now, several therapists later, our two households can communicate only via lawyer, and even now there are blowups. I wish that she could at least appreciate that her son and I have a loving relationship, but I sometimes think she'd rather that I be a terrible person to give her an excuse for hating me."

Lynnette, the custodial stepmom of three elementary school children, had a similar experience when her stepchildren's biological mother lost custody of them.

"I didn't know how to function being the object of such intense and systematic hatred," she says, but adds, "the children were a little unruly, but they are wonderful, sweet, and absolutely dear."

Relationships between stepparents and stepchildren can vary greatly. There truly are some children that "only a mother could love", and there are stepmothers that behave badly and give their stepchildren good reason to dislike them. Sometimes a stepmom tries her best, but is faced with a "team" made up of her husband and stepchildren, against which she's always losing.

Other stepmoms and stepkids just "click".

"I love my stepdaughter as if she is my own," says Rebekkah. "She's sweet, smart, funny, pretty, and talented. We actually enjoy being together, and she's never given me that "You're not my real mom" crap. But I give so much of the credit to her, for being the kind of person she is, frankly, she's an easy kid to love."

A big reason why the rate of divorce among second marriages is extraordinarily high is that the husband and wife often argue over the children. Jane is a clinical social worker and a stepmom as well. She knows from personal experience how important it is to keep the marital relationship strong. "My husband and I have always known that we were together because we loved each other, not because we wanted a pseudo-family," she says.

Jane emphasizes the need for the children's father to promote the stepmom as a parent figure within the household, deserving of respect. "When I would have a little struggle," says Jane, who has two stepchildren, was supported by my husband. "Still, it took time to acclimate."

"Many husbands," she says, "want their wives to be pals with the children" - an unrealistic wish. And many "experts" on stepparenting say that stepmoms should never discipline their stepkids. But discipline is not punishment; it's a form of teaching and can be done in a positive way.

"Discipline comes from the word "disciple", Jane says. "It's about directing them in the way they should go. Children need the adults in their lives to be parents, not friends."


Link to article: http://secondwivescafe.com/article.php?id=40

Teresa Paprock is a freelance writer, co-author of two books, and the editor of a parenting magazine in the Midwest, as well as the stepmom of a 13-year-old boy.

Operation Buckeye: Please Help!

The Christmas I found out I was pregnant with Nicholas was when my dad sent out his first care packages to the troops in Iraq and Afghanistan. It wasn't called anything then -- it was just my dad collecting items or money to buy items to send in the first round of boxes. He got the idea after reading a newspaper article about our troops.

Most, if not all, the money came from my dad and mom, our family [including me and the hubby] and dad's friends. My hubby and I went to Meijer with him to buy the items for those first boxes and planned to help him pack them all up. [While the hubby helped Dad fill the cart, I snuck off to buy my pregnancy test!]

Since then, this labor of love has a name, more volunteers, more attention and more funds. It's not just my dad, Jim, anymore. It's now called Operation Buckeye. Last year, 1064 boxes were sent to the men and women of our armed forces. To date, over 1400 boxes have been sent.

Trying to bring a touch of home and brighten the day of a soldier, the boxes contain items that are both treats and necessities: Beef Jerky and hard candy are two of the favorites, along with drink mixes (to give water a better taste). Gum, chips, cheese crackers, canned fruit, granola bars, tuna snacks, tooth brushes and paste, books, batteries, deodorant, foot powder, peanuts, puzzle books, and wipes are only a partial list of items sent.


Want to Help Operation Buckeye?
There are several ways to help. The most obvious is through donations:

Operation Buckeye
PO Box 1814
Westerville, OH 43086-1814

Or dropped off at any Huntington Bank branch [if you live in Columbus, OH].
Please make all checks out to "Operation Buckeye"

They also look for volunteers. Volunteers gather at Operation Buckeye HQ every second and fourth Saturday. Boxes are usually packed from 1pm to 4pm.

Operation Buckeye HQ is located at :
4290 N. High Street
Columbus, OH 43214


Contact Operation Buckeye:
Jim Caronis [my wonderful dad!!] - Chairman: Jim@operationbuckeye.org
Dave Eyestone - Treasurer: Dave@operationbuckeye.org


More About Operation Buckeye
OPERATION BUCKEYE was formed with the sole purpose of sending boxes to our troops as a way to thank them for their efforts and to bring a touch of home to them. The physical conditions they endure are difficult and being away from family for long periods of time is also difficult.

OPERATION BUCKEYE boxes contain food and snacks, personal hygiene items, reading materials, and good wishes of love and support.

All monies raised through letter writing campaigns, media exposure, and donations from individuals and companies are used to purchase items , supplies, and postage. OPERATION BUCKEYE provides caring civilians the opportunity to show their appreciation and respect to the men and women of our military stationed in hostile and remote regions of the world.


Related Articles or Stories:

http://www.dispatch.com/live/contentbe/dispatch/2006/10/19/20061019-C1-00.html
http://ohio15th.blogspot.com/2007_03_01_archive.html
http://www.dispatch.com/live/contentbe/dispatch/2007/03/01/20070301-B1-01.html http://www.dispatch.com/dispatch/content/local_news/stories/2007/05/27/MIKE27.ART_ART_05-27-07_B2_0K6RAR0.html


P.S. My dad has NO idea I posted this in my blog! He's not about self-promotion, but I wanted to try and help out, so I've been putting the word out about Operation Buckeye. And I'm SO proud of my dad for doing all of this and just wanted to brag a little about him......

Fun With Photoshop & Filters

I'm a Photoshop JUNKIE, that's for sure. I love that program. You can take away most of my software, and I wouldn't complain. Try to take away Photoshop [notice I say TRY], and get ready for a big ole bruhaha.

In addition to being a PS addict, I am also into filters. You can use filters to get some COOL and amazing effects. Or combine multiple filters on layers. The possibilities are endless, and the results can be spectacular.

Lately, I've been having a BLAST with Filter Forge. I have been getting exciting results! Some of the images look like they were drawn or painted. So, I thought I would share a little slide show of my latest work [not everything was done with Filter Forge....some is just good, old fashioned Photoshop editing!]....